How to Win Friends & Influence People
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Written in the 1930’s, the book is still alive and kicking. Personally, How to Win Friends & Influence People is the book that has impacted me most 💥in my life.
It is considered a business, management and/or leadership book. I find the title misleading. “Influence People” even hints a touch manipulative, but could not be more distant from its content.
Dale Carnegie, through numerous examples (and I mean numerous), showcases human interaction behavior leading to a positive impact on those around us. It is not nuclear science 🤯, nor things we have not heard before. The book is a reminder of the unexpected consequences that selflessness, authenticity, and appreciation can unveil.
The book per se is dry, with an overwhelming number of examples. I can imagine by this point you cannot wait to read it 😆. It contains breadcrumb-size lessons that if applied genuinely, the effects are exponential 📈. My personal favorite is: “Remember that a person’s name is the sweetest and most important sound in any language”. It summarizes in “remember and call people by their name”, regardless if they are the prime minister, a coworker, or a taxi driver, it is the best compliment you can pay to them. Below is a personal anecdote of how impactful calling someone by their name can be.
How to Win Friends & Influence People (Applied)
In 2018, living in Barcelona, I was at the cashier of a supermarket, listening to the constant beeping of my items getting scanned. While I was finishing bagging my soon-to-be purchases, my eyes fixated in the cashier’s name tag: “Laura”.
Bagged, swiped, paid. I was waiting for the transaction confirmation from the bank, while I pronounced these exact words: “Muchas gracias Laura. Que tengas un buen día!” (“Thank you very much Laura. Have a good day!”). Astonished and checking her name tag was in place, Laura responded: “Thank you! You are the first customer that makes me feel like a person and not like a cashier.”
To this day I still get goosebumps of what little effort it took to have a memorable impact on Laura’s day.
I recommend this book to EVERYONE, including managers and executives. The wisdom in it and the consequences of it are invaluable. They will make you more human, enhancing your capability to connect with anyone around you.
🤔 Reflections for you: How do you currently make your interactions with others more personal? How can you apply some of these lessons in your personal and professional environments?
🎯 Challenge yourself: Next time you go to the supermarket, post office, bar, etc., get uncomfortable, ask the person who is attending you for their name, and thank them for their service. Be genuine. How much effort was it? What impact did it have? Let me know in the comments below.
📖 Reading Tip: Each chapter contains a lot of similar examples. To avoid monotony and optimize your time, my recommendation is to read each chapter starting with its last page, where the chapter’s highlight is captured. Then, go back to the beginning of the chapter to read one or two examples and grasp the application of the chapter’s highlights.
